Ophidia and I were finally able to come to agreement on the design for two of the puppets. Now for the rest…
Work continues on puppet construction for “Up Late, Late at Night”
Puppet play, Up Late, Late at NightUp Late, Late at Night
From the desk of Thomas Typewriter…09/14/2020
From the desk of Thomas Typewriter, Up Late, Late at NightAnother week, another update…
Last week did not go so smoothly. I am not happy, more so displeased with myself. I changed my method for working on my college classes and I disrupted my whole flow. I missed two assignments and failed to meet any of my script goals. Why do I do this to myself? I forget how important routines are for my attention difficulties. I just get this impulse, building in intensity like a bonfire, going from a spark to a raging fire. At least I have lived long enough, and been burned enough times, I can get back on track.
Up Late, Late at Night made minimal progress since the last update. Ophidia and myself are still working through character designs that we can both agree on. It is frustrating at times, but it is very important to me that she feels listened to. Important that Ophidia feels involved and respected. While we work on the puppet designs, I have started looking around the house to see where we could film the show. So far the basement looks the most likely.
Up Late, Late at Night: Season One, Episode One, Act VI script
Puppet play, scripts, Up Late, Late at Night———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
Act VI
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020
———–<:typehouse:>———–
———–ACT VI———–
FADE IN
EXT. VARIOUS LOCATIONS ACROSS THE GLOBE, DAYTIME
LS OF THE CHASE
D-COP, B-COP, JEWELCASE, CASS-E, HANSEL, GRETEL, and V-HESS are running from the angry mob of LASER JUDGE, PADDLES, CLAMSHELL and the PARTY GUESTS. D-Cop’s group are stage-right in the frame while Laser Judge’s group are stage-left.
Have each group running in place as the background cycles through photos of famous landmarks across the world. A simple chase montage to give an impression that they are being chased very far.
CUT TO
EXT. COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY, DAYTIME
The background is a photo of the front of the COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY. This should be a generic university that we could use over and over. If need be, a model can be built and a photo taken of the model.
D-COP’S group (D-COP, B-COP, JEWELCASE, CASS-E, HANSEL, GRETEL, and V-HESS) enter stage-left and run across the screen exiting stage-right. LASER JUDGE’S group (LASER JUDGE, PADDLES, CLAMSHELL, and the PARTY GUESTS) soon follow. They enter stage-left, run across the screen and then exit stage-right.
ZOOM IN ON ONE OF THE BUILDINGS IN BACKGROUND OF THE COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY
FADE TO
INT. COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY CLASSROOM MPG-27.5
LS OF THE BACK HALF OF CLASSROOM
The back half of the classroom is divided into two rows, with the front row being lower than the back row. Each row is a series of desks arranged in one long line facing the front. In the center desk of the front row sits GIBLETS. He is unconscious.
PAN IN ON GIBLETS. GO FROM LS TO MS.
Giblets wakes with a start. He sits up and looks around.
GIBLETS
“Is class over? (looks around)Guess so.”
Giblets stands up. He reaches over and picks up his guitar and slings it over his back. He exits stage-right.
CUT TO
EXT. COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY, DAYTIME
LS OF COLLEGE FRONT
Giblets walks across the screen, stage-left to stage-right then exits.
CUT TO
EXT. COUNTRY ROAD, AFTERNOON
LS OF COUNTRY ROAD LOOKING DOWN THE ROAD AT A SLIGHT ANGLE AND ELEVATED. LOOKING DOWN.
The country road is two-lane, with a gravel edge and drainage ditch on either side. Telephone poles line one side of the road while trees or fencing line the other side.
GIBLETS enters the frame, back to camera, and walks away from the camera, into the distance. He walks slowly along the side of the road as SLOW MELANCHOLIC PIANO MUSIC plays
FADE TO BLACK
TRANSITION FROM TV SHOW TO THE TRASH HOLE
PAN OUT CAMERA SLIGHTLY TO SHOW THE BLACK SCREEN IS THE BLACK SCREEN ON A TV SET.
INT. THE TRASH HOLE. NIGHT
LS OF THE TV AREA
The broken TV which D-Vid and B-Max were working on, and ultimately zapped into, shows a screen of black. Soon end credits scroll across the screen. If needed, the name of the show that played is “U-turns Me” directed by “Alan Smitheelufagus”
CUT TO MS OF T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
T-RASH watches the end credits roll.
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“I liked that. Wonder what is on next.”
FADE OUT
Up Late, Late At Night: Season One, Episode One, Act Five script
Puppet play, scripts, Up Late, Late at Night———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
ACT V
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020 thomas & ophidia
———–<:typehouse:>———–
———–ACT V————
FADE IN
OPEN ON A CLOSE SHOT OF THE FUNDRAISER FLYER WITH THE STAGE CURTAIN BEHIND IT. THE FLYER ZOOMS AWAY AND THE CAMERA MOVES DOWN TO THE BEHIND THE STAGE
INT. BACKSTAGE OF THE LASER JUDGE’S GARDEN STAGE. AFTERNOON.
The stage curtain lines the back of the stage. D-COP, B-COP, B-RAY and MR. PUPPETS, CLAMSHELL, CASS-E, V-HESS, JEWELCASE, GRETAL and HANSEL are gathered behind stage ready to preform. Everyone is dressed in white and red and stationed with an instrument except B-ray. He is off to the side dressed in a very wide lapeled suit.
B-COP is holding a guitar and wearing a white suit, red vest and pants. Cass-E has her hair down, dressed in white shirt with red vest and pants, stands at a portable organ. Jewelcase is dressed in a red suit with a white undershirt and giant carafe. She stands in front of a keyboard. Hansel sits at a drum kit dressed in white shirt and matching red vest and pants. Clamshell holds a bass guitar and wears a white shirt and red vest/pants outfit similar to the others. Gretel wears a red and white jumper and holds a tambourine. B-COP is dressed in all black, black pants black tee with sleeves cut off and a loosely tied black tie. She is holding a guitar. B-Ray is wearing a head mic and earpiece while holding Mr. Puppets. Mr. Puppets wears a similar ear piece while holding a clipboard.
MR. PUPPETS
(looking at notes on clipboard) “Were on in five Big D.”
D-COP
“Everyone ready?”
All the others nod yes.
D-COP
“And let me remind everyone this is probably my last chance to trick the Laser Judge into giving me a chance to earn her love. Play like my love life depends on it.”
B-COP
“Hopefully you all play better than you drive.”
D-COP
(looking over at B-Ray & Mr. Puppets at the side of the stage ready to work the curtain) “When I count to three, open the curtains.
B-RAY
“Got it.”
D-COP
“1…2…wait. Clamshell, is that Paddles in your coat.”
CLAMSHELL
“Yes.”
D-COP
“Why isn’t he back at the house?”
CLAMSHELL
“I thought he’d get lonely. Besides, he loves to rock out. Isn’t that right Paddles.”
PADDLES
“Woof Woof”
D-COP
“If Laser Judge sees us with her stolen dog, she is going to know we stole the dog.”
B-COP
“You stole.”
D-COP
“I stole. Now get Paddles out of here before anyone sees him. Hide him in the car for now.”
Clamshell and Paddles exit stage-left.
TRANSITION FROM BACKSTAGE TO THE FRONT ENTRANCE
CUT TO…
EXT. FRONT GATES OF LASER JUDGES MANSION, AFTERNOON
A brick wall, the Laser Judge’s property’s fence, runs across the stage. There is a large metal gate and driveway to the stage-left side. A larger cardboard box sits outside the front gate. “FOR DONATION” is written on the outside of the box in large letters. On the stage-right are some cars parked along the grass embankment.
CLAMSHELL enters through the garden gate, walking from the party to where he parked on the road outside the Laser Judge’s estate. PADDLES is still in his shirt. He walks over to the second car, opens the door, and places Paddles inside. The second car’s license plate reads “DCOPS CAR”.
CUT TO MS OF CLAMSHELL AND PADDLES
CLAMSHELL
“Now be good and wait here.”
CUT TO CS OF PADDLES
Paddles wimpers.
CUT TO CS OF CLAMSHELL
CLAMSHELL
“Oh, don’t cry. I’ll be back soon I promise.”
Paddles jumps licking Clamshell’s face
CLAMSHELL
“Oh, that tickles. I love you too boy.”
CUT TO MS OF CLAMSHELL AND PADDLES
Clamshell pushes Paddles into the car and shuts the door.
CLAMSHELL
“Be a good boy while I am gone okay.”
Paddles nods yes. Clamshell walks away.
CS TO PADDLES
Paddles reveals he stole the keys for the car from Clamshell.
PADDLES
(gives a laugh)
He moves over to the steering wheel and starts the car. The Car drives out of frame, stage-left.
CUT TO MS OF CLAMSHELL AT THE GATES
Clamshell is returning to the party, walking up to the front gates. He passes by the box, stops, and backtracks to look inside the box. He removes some clothes and walks through the gate.
TRANSITION FROM FRONT GATES TO PARTY ENTRANCE
EXT. THE PARTY ENTRANCE, AFTERNOON
LS OF PARTY ENTRANCE
NATE TRACK, an eight-track cassette dressed as a security guard, stands at a podium erected on the top of the driveway. This would be in an area of to the side from the driveway, that could serve as access to a path along the side of Laser Judge’s house leading to the garden in the back. The party itself is being held in the back lawn garden. An arch of balloons acts as the gateway to the party. Nate Track stands in front of the archway. CLAMSHELL, dressed in a tux with tails and tophat. Now the thing is that Clamshell’s tux looks all wrinkled since he pulled it was stuffed into a box.
CUT TO MS OF NATE TRACK AND CLAMSHELLS
Clamshell attempts to go through the archway, but Nate blocks his path.
NATE TRACK
“Reservations.”
In response to this question, Clamshell pulls out a monocle and puts it on.
NATE TRACK
“Sir, If you do not have a reservation, I am going to have to ask you step aside.”
To this Clamshell responds by pulling out a second monocle from his jacket. He places the second monocle over the first.
NATE TRACK
“Two monocles! Only the wealthy can afford such eccentricities. I am sorry sir, I didn’t notice your wealth originally. Please accept my sincerest apologies and enjoy the party.”
Nate Track steps to the side of the archway. Clamshell nods and walks through the archway.
CUT BACK TO…
INT. BACKSTAGE OF THE LASER JUDGE’S GARDEN STAGE. AFTERNOON.
Everyone is waiting at their instruments, except B-Ray and Mr. Puppets. They stand off to the side by the curtain and light controls.
B-COP
“What is taking Clamshell so long?”
D-COP
“We don’t have time to wait. Everyone, we go live on the count of three. One…Two…Three…”
B-Ray starts to open the curtains.
CUT TO (OR REVERSAL)
EXT. LASER JUDGE’S GARDEN STAGE
LS OF STAGE FROM AUDIENCE
The curtain opens as we hear a slow beat. Everyone in the band faces towards the audience while D-Cop has his back to the audience. The rest of the band is arranged around him in a semi-circular fashion. D-Cop bops to the beat a few times and then turns around. He moves up to the microphone to speak. In the Audience, near the front of the stage stands LASER JUDGE. Towards the back of the audience stands CLAMSHELL.
D-COP
“Hello everyone, I am D-Cop and together with these fine folks behind me, we are Vega’s Lemons, your entertainment tonight. When the Laser Judge asked us to help out with tonight’s fundraiser to find that lost little bundle of joy, Paddles, well, I’ll be honest, I shed a tear. Thinking of that poor scared dog definitely lost and not taking a bath in someone’s house, well we had to say yes. (Turns to look directly at someone) Laser Judge, I will always say yes to you.”
B-COP
“Ahem”
D-COP
“Oh yes. Enough seriousness, this is a party. Lets enjoy ourselves. Now those youngsters in the audience may not know this one, but trust us old timers when I say, in our day, this song rocked our world. (turns to band) Okay on three. One, Two,…”
The band starts to poorly play Rock-A-Bye Baby.
D-COP
“Rock-a-by baby on the tree top. When the wind blows, the cradle will rock. When the bough breaks…”
CLAMSHELL, dressed in his rumpled found tux and holding a plate of fruit and hors d’oeurves, stands up.
CLAMSHELL
(shouts) “YOU SUCK!
D-COP
“Oh, you know that one. Well, how about this one.”
They start to play Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star
D-COP
“Twinkle, twinkle, little star…”
CLAMSHELL
“GET OFF THE STAGE!”
Clamshell throws food at the band. D-COP gets hit by food. Then the rest of the audience joins in throwing food at the band.
INSERT CS OF THE VARIOUS MEMBERS OF THE BAND BEING HIT BY FOOD.
The band recoils and tries to shield themselves behind their instruments.
SLOW-MOTION
Then a LOUD CRASH as D-Cop’s car crashes through the wall of the back of the stage. PADDLES, dressed in a rock star outfit, flies out of the windshield. Paddles flies out and lands on the stage, guitar in paws. He slides across the stage to the astonished looks of the band and audience
INSERT VARIOUS CS OF THE SURPRISED LOOKS ON THE AUDIENCE MEMBERS AND BAND MEMBERS
He reaches the front of the stage and starts to shred on his guitar.
SLOW-MOTION ENDS AND REGULAR SPEED RESUMES
Everyone stands frozen and silent, in shock at Paddles arrival. Paddles finishes his guitar solo and stands. He bows the audience.
LASER JUDGE
“Paddles! That’s my Paddles.”
PADDLES
“Woof”
LASER JUDGE
“Come here boy, I’ve missed you so much.”
Paddles jumps off the stage and onto the lap of Laser Judge. They excitedly snuggle.
CLAMSHELL
“Everyone, he must of escaped in the car of the dognapper.”
D-COP
“Now, lets not jump to any incriminating conclusions. The important thing is they are reunited right.”
CLAMSHELL
“The car’s license plate says DCOP. Everyone, D-Cop is the dognapper. DOGNAPPER! DOGNAPPER!”
LASER JUDGE
“He’s right. Dognapper!”
The audience starts to chant “Dognappers!”.
D-COP
“Thank you everyone, you’ve been a great audience, but our time here has come to a close, and let me say…”
CLAMSHELL
“Get them!”
B-COP
“Cheese it fellas!”
The band runs off stage. The audience follows chasing behind them. The audience now has torches and pitchforks.
ONCE EVERYONE HAS LEFT THE FRAME PAN IN ON THE CAR CRASHED THROUGH THE BACK OF THE STAGE.
Pinned under the car, B-Ray hopes help finds him soon.
CS OF B-RAY PINNED UNDER THE CAR
B-RAY
(to Mr. Puppets) “It’s all up to you Mr. Puppets to get help. You’re my last hope.”
CUT TO MS OF B-RAY, WITH THE CAMERA ON THE STAGE OR FLOOR LEVEL.
B-Ray tosses Mr. Puppets.
B-RAY
“Go Mr. Puppets. Run for help.”
Mr. Puppets lands on the stage, next to the camera so that the crumpled Mr. Puppets is in the foreground of the shot and the crushed B-Ray is in the background. Hold the shot a few moments.
B-RAY
“I’m screwed.”
FADE OUT
updating…
From the desk of Thomas Typewriter, Up Late, Late at NightThe storm last week covered our streets in tree branches. Everywhere I drive in The City of Champions, there are piles of debris in every yard. Luckily, my house and family were unharmed. Just giant elm branches and drooping telephone lines in my backyard. The branches I’ll work into building some new garden beds. The dropping telephone line I’ll try to convince the Utility company to come out and fix. Automated customer service prompts here I come.
Up Late, Late at Night continues its glacial pace forward. Ophidia is out of habit on storyboarding, so she is working to get back into a groove. I have no room to complain, because I am no speed demon when it comes to the scripts. I’ll post the Season One, Episode One, Act Five script on Wednesday. Then I’ll finish and post the Act Six script next week. After that, Ophidia will work on storyboards while I start constructing puppets.
Up Late, Late At Night: Season One, Episode One, Act IV script
scripts, Up Late, Late at Night———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
ACT IV
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020
———–<:typehouse:>———–
———–ACT IV———–
FADE IN
EXT. D-COP’S HOUSE, DAYTIME
OPEN ON A LS OF THE FRONT OF D-COP’S HOUSE
Hold the shot a moment, but then we catch a glimpse of the students sneaking one by one from some object in the yard, shrub or shed…etc, to the back of the house. The very first should be V-HESS and the last should be JEWELCASE.
CUT TO MS OF REAR OF D-COP’S HOUSE
V-HESS, CASS-E, HANSEL, GRETEL, B-RAY with MR PUPPET, CLAMSHELL, and JEWELCASE huddle near a window.
CASS-E
(strong whisper) “What are we doing here.”
EVERYONE ELSE
“Yeah.”
V-HESS
“Shhh. You want him to hear us.”
B-RAY
“Then why are we sneaking around his house on a Saturday morning.”
MR. PUPPETS
“Yeah we could be watching cartoons, like the one where the Fonz travels in a spaceship.”
V-HESS
“I’m tired of that guy and that class. It makes no sense. Twenty hours to explain how to adjust the mirrors. Something weird is going on.”
B-COP
(off-screen) “You better believe something weird is going on.”
THE CAMERA PANS OUT ENOUGH TO SHOW B-COP AND THE HUDDLED STUDENTS.
CASS-E
“Oh no. Cheese it fellas!”
B-COP
“Cool it. I am not here to rat you out. I want answers too. Why’s he so excited to teach this class? (turns to V-Hess) So what’s your plan.”
V-HESS
“There’s dog poo everywhere in his backyard. So I made a giant bag of dog poo that we will set on fire. Heck, we could even make two flaming poo bags. Yeah. Double doo-doo doorbell ditch.”
Everyone groans.
B-COP
“That is awful. Why don’t we look in the window instead. Spy on him and see what he is up to.”
Everyone agrees B-Cop’s idea is a better idea. V-Hess throws away the bag of dog poop.
B-COP
“Okay. Now who is the lucky person to look through the window. It’ll need to be the lightest person here.”
Everyone looks around.
CAMERA SHIFTS BACK AND FORTH TILL FINALLY SETTLING ON MR PUPPETS.
MR PUPPETS
“Uh-oh.”
CUT TO…
INT. D-COP’S BATHROOM, DAYTIME
A simple bathroom with a bathtub/shower and toilet along one wall. On the other wall is the vanity, mirror, and towel rack. A window sits up high on the short wall perpendicular to the tub wall and vanity wall.
LS OF BATHROOM
D-COP sits in the bathtub with PADDLES, a dog made from a ping-pong paddle. The bathtub is filled with bubbles from an especially foamy bubble bath. D-COP is singing into a scrub brush. While D-Cop sings we can see the face of Mr. Puppets come into view in the upper window.
D-COP
(singing into scrub brush as if it was a microphone) “I met him at the dance floor.
He turned around and I said I would take more.
When we danced, we danced.
All the stars were shining advanced.
You get the idea.”
D-COP points the scrubbrush to PADDLES
PADDLES
“Woo-Woo-Woof”
D-COP
“That’s when I kissed the Leader of the Pack.
Uh-huh
That’s when I kissed the Leader of the Pack.”
PAN OR TILT THE CAMERA UP SO WE CAN SEE MR. PUPPETS MAKE A FACE AT WHAT HE IS SEEING.
Mr. Puppets leans in further to watch. Soon his face is joined by more of the classmates. Then there is a loud RIPPING NOISE as the wall caves in and everyone topples into the bathroom. D-Cop screams.
Cass-E rises first.
CASS-E
“Cheese it fellas I think he’s noticed us.”
Everyone runs out of the room.
CUT TO…
INT. LIVING ROOM OF D-COP’S HOUSE, DAYTIME
D-Cop’s living room has two sofas and a recliner. A large sofa in the center with a smaller sofa off to stage-left and a recliner to stage-right. V-HESS, B-RAY and Mr. Puppets sit on the smaller sofa. CLAMSHELL, CASS-E, and JEWLECASE sit on the larger sofa leaving a space at the stage-right end. B-COP sits in the recliner. HANSEL AND GRETEL are playing with PADDLES behind the sofa. D-COP is carrying a tray giving drinks to everyone.
B-COP
“So you’re saying the reason you have been acting so weird and why caught you having a bubble-bath sing-along with a dog is that you dognapped Judge Laser’s dog to make her too upset to teach traffic school so she would have to ask you to teach the class and she would then realize how great you are.”
D-Cop sits down on empty spot on larger sofa.
D-COP.
“Yup.”
B-COP
“That’s messed up.”
Clamshell stands up and claps, slow clap. He walks over to D-Cop.
CLAMSHELL
“I just want to say that was the most impressive thing I have ever heard in my years on this planet. I have been needing the guidance of somebody as wise as you. Please teach me to be just like you.”
B-COP
“Whoa, whoa…”
V-Hess stands.
V-HESS
“Just like Clamshell, I just want to say that is the most gnarly bone-curdling thing I have ever heard and I am on board. Teach me your dark ways.”
B-COP
“I think you two are reading this all wrong.”
Cass-E stands.
CASS-E
“Maybe it’s all the medications I take but what all of you are saying makes a lot of sense to me right now and I want to learn your ways of love.”
Clamshell stands.
B-COP
“Oh, not the little old lady too.”
CLAMSHELL
“I may have started this class as a puppeteer…”
CUT TO CS OF B-RAY MR. PUPPETS
B-RAY
“What?”
CUT BACK TO CLAMSHELL
CLAMSHELL
“But you sir are the true master of Puppets. Count me in.”
Just then the phone rings. RING, RING, RING. D-Cop goes over to pick it up, moving into the foreground. Maybe have a shift of some kind, like lighting brighter on him and background darkens. Shift back at end of call.
D-COP
“D-Cop’s residence, D-Cop speaking. What’s that. Oh, hi Laser Judge. Are you crying? Oh, I’m sorry. What’s wrong. (pauses as he listens) No. They did what. Is there anything I can do to help. (listens) Well, I could take over for that if it would help you out. You know I am always willing to help you out. Okay, so dry those tears I’ll be right over and everything will be better. We’ll get through this, together.”
D-Cop hangs up the phone.
D-COP
“That was Laser Judge. Her Garden Party Fundraiser is a disaster. The band canceled on her and she is at a loss. My plan is working…”
B-COP
(off-camera) “No it’s not.”
D-COP
“Luckily for her, old D-Cop is here to save the day, because something you may not know about me my other Minor in college was music.”
D-COP turns around and the visual effect goes away. We now can see that everyone except Paddles and B-Cop are dressed like D-Cop.
CLAMSHELL
“That’s funny because my other minor in college was music.”
V-HESS
“That’s funny too because my other minor in college was also music.”
CASS-E
“Weirdly enough my other minor in college was music.”
CUT TO CS OF B-COP
B-COP
(turns to camera) “I better stick around to save them from themselves.”
FADE OUT
Up Late, Late At Night! Season 01, Episode 01, Act III
Uncategorized, Up Late, Late at Night———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
Act III
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020
———–<:typehouse:>———–
FADE IN
INT. COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY MAIN ENTRANCE. NIGHT
OPEN ON A CS OF THE SIGNBOARD
A signboard in front of the Local College main hallway. It bears the college title and logo on top, with various flyers posted to the side. The signboard itself reads as follows:
FUEL ECONOMICS 101
ROOM MPG-54.5
——–>
TRAFFIC SCHOOL
ROOM MPG-27.5
<——-
TRANSITION FROM ENTRANCE TO CLASSROOM
INT. COMMUNITY COLLEGE UNIVERSITY CLASSROOM MPG-27.5. NIGHT
OPEN ON A MS OF THE FRONT OF THE CLASSROOM
We can divide the sets into two sections here. The first section will be the front of the classroom which has a desk and wide chalkboard while the second section or the back of the classroom contains the rows of desks and chairs.
D-COP Stands at a podium at the front of the class. B-COP sits on the desk behind him. On the chalkboard is written “Traffic School…RULES”
The back half of the classroom is divided into two rows, with the front row being lower than the back row. In the front row sits three students, stage-left to stage-right: CASS-E, GIBLETS, and L.P. In the second row, stage-left to stage-right sit: V-HESS, JEWELCASE, B-RAY, and CLAMSHELL.
D-COP
“Hello everyone.”
CUT TO LS OF THE SECOND SECTION OR BACK OF THE CLASSROOM
EVERYONE
“Hello.”
D-COP
“Welcome to traffic school. I am your instructor D-Cop. This is my career partner B-Cop and we will be teaching this class. Before we go any further, lets take roll call shall we. Cass-E?”
CUT TO CS OF CASS-E
Cass-E sits at her desk, wearing cracked eyeglasses, a large neck brace and three bandages. Multiple bottles of pills and vitamins sit atop her desk area.
CASS-E
“Here”
CUT BACK TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Giblets.”
CUT TO CS OF GIBLETS.
Giblets lays unconscious on top of his desk.
CUT BACK TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Oh yeah, the turkey. Moving on. L.P.”
L.P. is a 12″ vinyl record dressed like a witch from an old fairy tale. On either side of her sit HANSEL and GRETEL coloring in coloring books. Hansel and Gretel are made from 7″ vinyl records.
L.P.
“Here. This is the babysitter training class right?”
CUT TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“No. It’s traffic school.”
CUT TO CS OF L.P.
L.P.
“Uh-oh. But I promised these kids I’d take them to my candy house after taking a babysitting class.”
HANSEL AND GRETEL
(chanting) “Candy, candy, candy…”
CUT TO CS OF CASS-E
CASS-E
“Are those your kids?”
CUT TO HANSEL AND GRETEL
HANSEL
“She found us in the woods.”
GRETEL
“The birds ate our trail of breadcrumbs and we got lost. Then we found this nice lady.”
CUT TO CS OF CASS-E
CASS-E
“That sounds like kidnapping.”
CUT TO L.P.
L.P.
“Uhhh…”
CUT TO CS OF B-COP
B-COP
“I don’t like the sound of this.”
CUT TO MS OF ROOM
Everyone is staring at L.P. as she stammers. After a few moments, L.P. gets up and runs out of the classroom.
CUT TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Okay. Moving on.
B-COP
“Aren’t we going to do something about that kidnapping? We are cops after all.”
D-COP
“No time. Too much to teach. Moving on. V-Hess.”
CUT TO CS OF V-HESS
V-Hess, a VHS cassette, wears a cut off jean jacket and hockey mask. His shirt and jacket is covered in horror film characters or images.
V-HESS
“Here. So when do we get to see the car crashes and the dead bodies?”
CUT TO CS OF GRETEL AND HANSEL
GRETEL
“Maybe we should get him to give us a ride home. He sounds like a bad boy.”
HANSEL
(chanting)”Bad boy! Bad Boy! Bad Boy!”
CUT TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“No, all of you. We are not watching videos of car crashes and little girl do not go home with him. Moving on…Jewelcase. Jewelcase?”
CUT TO CS OF JEWELCASE
Jewelcase, a CD case wearing comically too large pastel colored glasses and a large boifant of white hair, sits at her desk. She is looking around the room.
CUT TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Jewelcase.”
CUT TO CS OF JEWELCASE
She stares around the room.
CUT BACK TO D-COP
D-COP
“Jewelcase. (louder) Jewelcase.”
CUT TO CS OF JEWELCASE
She leans over towards B-Ray. B-Ray, a blu-ray disc, dressed in a light jacket. He has small puppets on the desk around him.
JEWELCASE
“I think they’re calling your name. You better say here before he gets mad. Wouldn’t want to start the first day on a bad note.”
B-RAY
“Uh, here.”
CUT BACK TO D-COP
D-COP
“Finally. Moving on…B-Ray.”
CUT TO MS OF BOTH JEWELCASE AND B-RAY
JEWELCASE
“Here.”
B-Ray turns in surprise and stares at Jewelcase before turning to one of his puppets, Mr. Puppet.
B-RAY
“Can you believe the nerve of some people?”
MR. PUPPET
(B-RAY DOING THE VOICE IN A BAD VENTRILOQUIST WAY) “I know. It’s enough to make you give up on talking to other people altogether.”
CUT BACK TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Clamshell.”
CUT TO CS OF CLAMSHELL
Clamshell, a videocassette case only wearing dark glasses and pants, responds.
CLAMSHELL
“Here. And can I say I think your right. You got that thing. Got that thing figured out and I want to figure it out. Then we’ll both have that thing. Two things. Two’s better than one. Want to be like you. Starting now. Right now. Gotta get the thing.”
CUT BACK TO D-COP
D-COP
“Ookkaayy. Now that we’re settled in let me explain about the class. You all are here because you are the worst of the worst drivers on the road. Real slime under my boot. But that’s gonna change. B-Cop is going to change you. I’m going to change you. We’re gonna push you guys like you’ve never been pushed before. Some of you are gonna wish I was dead. I eat quitters for breakfast and I spit out their bones.”
B-COP
“Are you quoting Mike Ditka from Kicking and Screaming”
D-COP
(pause)”Its a good film. It was number one in Sight & Sound’s 2012 poll of The GREATEST FILMS EVER MADE.”
B-COP
“That’s weird because I was actually part of that poll and I remember Vertigo being number one.”
D-COP
“Changing subjects, we have a lot of material, so lets get started.”
INSERT “21 HOURS LATER…” INTERSTITIAL CARD
D-COP
“And so that ends our first lesson, “What to do before driving your car.”
CUT TO LS OF ALL THE STUDENTS
ALL STUDENTS
(groan)
CUT TO CS OF V-HESS AND CASS-E
V-HESS
“I can’t take anymore of this guy. Meet me Saturday, we’re going to take care of him. Pass it on.”
CASS-E nods and walks off towards the other students. V-Hess exits stage-left. Cass-E exits stage right.
FADE OUT
Up Late, Late at Night: Season 01, Episode 01, Acts I-II revised.
Uncategorized, Up Late, Late at NightNote that as Ophidia and I are working on this debate about whether 1985 or 1999 is the superior movie year disguised as a talking trash puppet show, she had a few issues with the rough script. I did a rewrite, asked for her feedback, then did another rewrite. Here is the end result. Enjoy. I am off to listen to The Undertones.
———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
Act I & Act II
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020
———–<:typehouse:>———–
———–ACT I————
FADE IN
EXT. THE TRASHIPELIGO ISLANDS, EVENING
LS OF A MODEL OF THE ISLAND.
Looking upon the garbage covered isles we hear the sounds of slumber and someone murmuring in his sleep.
CUT TO…
INT. THE TRASH HOLE. NIGHT
A large cavern in the base of the Trashipeligo Island’s dormant volcano, Mount Trashuvius finds T-RASH THE TRASH GOD sleeping. His large abstract mask-like face floats over a smoking pool of sludge and magma. Surrounding him are piles of trash. T-RASH’S eyes are dimmed as he sleeps trapped in a nightmare.
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
(mumbles in sleep) “No… No.. No….”
PAN IN TO CS OF T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Don’t clean that…no. Trash is okay. We don’t need to organize. Clutter is better. Stop it. (Starts to shout in his sleep) STOP IT. STOP IT. STOP IT.”
B-Max and D-Vid race in. B-Max enters from stage-left while D-Vid enters from stage-right. They run over to T-Rash.
B-MAX
“Wake up your disgustingness.”
D-VID
“You’re having a nightmare, your trashiness.”
T-RASH wakes up. His eyes fully light up as he escapes out of his nightmare.
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“B-Max. D-Vid.”
B-MAX
“It’s okay now. You were just having another nightmare.”
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“It was awful. They were trying to clean the island. I couldn’t stop them. So much soap. Lemon scented everywheres.”
D-VID
“That sounds awful.”
B-MAX
“But it is all over. You are safe now. The Trashipeligo Islands are still a hot mess.”
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Oh thank goodness. (short pause) I don’t think I’ll be able to go back to sleep right away.
Turn on the TV. Let me watch some while I calm down.”
B-Max and D-Vid exit stage right.
CUT TO LS OF TV AREA
B-Max and D-VID enter from stage-left. B-Max turns on the TV but nothing happens.
B-MAX
“It’s not working.”
D-VID
“We could try hitting it till it is repaired.”
CUT BACK TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Do that.”
CUT BACK TO TV AREA
D-Vid and B-MAX start to hit the set. Nothing changes.
CUT BACK TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Wait. Is it plugged in? Stop hitting it and check.”
CUT BACK TO TV AREA
D-Vid crawls behind the TV.
CUT TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“B-Max, go help D-Vid. You know he doesn’t know what he’s doing.”
CUT BACK TO TV AREA
B-Max crawls behind the TV.
D-VID
“The wires are all broken.”
B-MAX
“It’s a mess back here sir.”
D-VID
“I think our hitting it might have broken it more instead of repairing it more.
CUT TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“You think.”
CUT BACK TO TV AREA
D-VID
“I guess we could try fixing it using whatever trash is nearby.”
CUT BACK TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Good. Do that.”
CUT BACK TO TV AREA
D-Vid and B-Max start to go through the trash behind the TV. We see trash being through up and away from behind the TV as they look through the piles of garbage.
D-VID
“I’ve got a bunch of soup cans and a bent coat hanger. You find anything?”
B-MAX
“Half a radio and a barrel of diet pills.”
D-VID
“Oh. We can use those. Bring them over.”
We hear CONSTRUCTION NOISES from behind the TV. B-Max pokes her head up from the back as she mounts the coat hanger like an antenna on top of the TV.
D-VID
“If I know anything at all about repairing televisions, I’d say we did it. Let’s plug it in.”
B-MAX
“The plug doesn’t fit in the outlet anymore.”
D-VID
“Maybe if we both push, it’ll go in.”
We hear the sound of D-Vid and B-Max GROANING and then a loud SPARK and a flash of light from behind the TV. The TV powers on with a weird glow.
CUT TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Hey it’s working. It’s working guys.”
CUT TO TV SET
D-Vid and B-Max fail to come back from behind the TV set.
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
(off-screen) “Guys, it’s working. You can come out. Hello. Hello.”
CUT BACK TO T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Guess they left. Well more TV for me. Let’s see what’s on.”
CUT BACK TO TV AREA
PAN IN ON STATIC…
FADE OUT
———–ACT II————
FADE IN
INT. COP CAR. DAYTIME
MS OF INTERIOR OF A POLICE CAR.
D-COP, D-Vid dressed as a cop, sits behind the wheel driving, while B-COP, B-Max also dressed as a cop, sits in the passenger seat.
B-COP
“So then I wrestled that raccoon for the last pastry.”
D-COP
“Uh huh. Wait. Check out this turkey.”
B-COP
“Pull over.”
CUT TO
EXT. STREETER STREET. DAYTIME
MS OF GIBLETS
GIBLETS, a puppet made from a kid’s school project of turkey drawing made from tracing his/her hand, is walking down the street. He does need to have an old guitar strung across his back. We hear the sound of CAR DOORS SLAMMING SHUT.
PAN OUT TO LS SO AS TO INCLUDE GIBLETS ON RIGHT AND POLICE CAR ON LEFT.
D-Cop sits on the hood of the police car while B-Cop approaches Giblets.
GIBLETS
“Hello Officers.”
B-COP
“What do you think you’re doing walking down this street.”
GIBLETS
“Just soaking up the sunshine and the positive vibes.”
B-COP
“Are you getting smart? We’ll see about that.”
B-Cop grabs the guitar from off Giblets.
B-COP
“What are you doing with this old guitar.”
GIBLETS
“Old guitar? Why’d you call it an old guitar?”
CUT TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Maybe he’s smuggling stuffing.”
CUT BACK
B-COP
“You smuggling stuffing.”
GIBLETS
“Oh my gosh, it is an old guitar. It was new when I bought it. Has it been that long. No home. No wife. No kids.”
B-COP
“Wait.”
GIBLETS
“My youth, my time, I’ve squandered it. And what do I have to show for it.”
A spotlight clicks down on Giblets. The rest of the stage lighting dims
B-COP
(off-camera)”What’s going on.”
GIBLETS
“I could’a been a contender, I could of had love, could of had her…but who was looking out for me. Was it my brother. Was it her. STELLA! STELLA! STELLA!”
A loud THUNK and Giblets passes out. The stage lighting reverts back. D-Cop stands over an unconscious Giblets, with a police baton in hand.
D-COP
(to B-Cop) “And that is how you stop a turkey who’s had some bad gravy.”
The POLICE RADIO SQUAWKS. D-Cop walks over to the car and answers it. Meanwhile B-Cop drags the unconscious Giblets over to the car. D-Cop leans over, opens the driver door and leans in to answer the phone. B-Cop opens the rear passenger door and tries to tip Giblets inside.
D-COP
“Car 54 1/2 here. Over”
POLICE RADIO
(voice-over) “Sorry to spring this on you, but Judge Dee is not able to teach the driver’s education class. You’ve been reassigned. Report to Local College tonight. 6pm. Over”
D-COP
“Roger. We’ll be there. Over”
D-Cop hangs up the radio
D-COP
(dancing) “Yes. Yes.”
B-Cop slams the car door shut.
B-COP
“Why are you so happy?”
D-COP
“We’ve been reassigned to teach Judge Dee’s driver’s course.”
B-COP
“Ughhh, those classes are a pain, filled with weirdos. What’s so great about that.”
D-COP
“Guess you could say I have a case of puppy love… for the class. Puppy love for the class.”
B-COP
“Whatever.”
They get into the car.
CUT TO MS OF CAR INTERIOR
D-COP
“Oh, can we stop at the pet store. My doctor recommended I eat more dog food.”
B-COP
“What. You sure he’s a doctor cause that does not sound like something a doctor would say.”
D-COP
“Well he did have a stethoscope and accepted my insurance.”
B-COP
“Whatever. Lets just get going. This day just keeps getting worse.”
D-COP
“Oh, don’t be sad. I’ll share some of the dog food with you.”
FADE OUT
Up Late, Late at Night!: Season One, Episode One, Act Two script
scripts, Uncategorized, Up Late, Late at Night———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
(Act 2)
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020
———–<:type & opera:>———–
ACT II
FADE IN
INT. COP CAR. DAYTIME
MS OF INTERIOR OF A POLICE CAR.
D-COP, D-Vid dressed as a cop, sits behind the wheel driving, while B-COP, B-Max also dressed as a cop, sits in the passenger seat.
B-COP
“So then I wrestled that raccoon for the last pastry.”
D-COP
“Uh huh. Wait. Check out this turkey.”
B-COP
“Pull over.”
CUT TO
EXT. STREETER STREET. DAYTIME
MS OF GIBLETS
GIBLETS, a puppet made from a kid’s school project of turkey drawing made from tracing his/her hand, is walking down the street. He does need to have an old guitar strung across his back. We hear the sound of CAR DOORS SLAMMING SHUT.
PAN OUT TO LS SO AS TO INCLUDE GIBLETS ON RIGHT AND POLICE CAR ON RIGHT.
D-Cop sits on the hood of the police car while B-Cop approaches Giblets.
GIBLETS
“Hello Officers.”
B-COP
“What do you think your doing walking down this street.”
GIBLETS
“Just soaking up the sunshine and the positive vibes.”
B-COP
“Are you getting smart. We’ll see about that.”
B-Cop grabs the guitar from off Giblets.
B-COP
“What you doing with this old guitar.”
GIBLETS
“Old guitar? Why’d you call it an old guitar?”
CUT TO CS OF D-COP
D-COP
“Maybe he’s smuggling stuffing.”
CUT BACK
B-COP
“You smuggling stuffing.”
GIBLETS
“Oh my gosh, it is an old guitar. It was new when I bought it. Has it been that long. No home. No wife. No kids.”
B-COP
“Wait.”
GIBLETS
“My youth, my time, I’ve squandered it. And what do I have to show for it.”
A spotlight clicks down on Giblets. The rest of the stage lighting dims
B-COP
(off-camera)”What’s going on.”
GIBLETS
“I could’a been a contender, I could of had love, could of had her…but who was looking out for me. Was it my brother. Was it her. STELLA! STELLA! STELLA!”
A loud THUNK and Giblets passes out. The stage lighting reverts back. D-Cop stands over an unconscious Giblets, with a police baton in hand.
D-COP
(to B-Cop) “And that is how you stop a turkey who’s had some bad gravy.”
The POLICE RADIO SQUAWKS. D-Cop walks over to the car and answers it. Meanwhile B-Cop drags the unconscious Giblets over to the car. D-Cop leans opens the driver door and leans in to answer the phone. B-Cop opens the rear passenger door and tries to tip Giblets inside.
D-COP
“Car 54 1/2 here. Over”
POLICE RADIO
(voice-over) “Sorry to spring this on you, but Judge Dee is not able to teach the driver’s education class. You’ve been reassigned. Report to Local College tonight. 6pm. Over”
D-COP
“Roger. We’ll be there. Over”
D-Cop hangs up the radio
D-COP
(dancing) “Yes. Yes.”
B-Cop slams the car door shut.
B-COP
“Why are you so happy?”
D-COP
“We’ve been reassigned to teach Judge Dee’s driver’s course.”
B-COP
“Ughhh, those classes are a pain, filled with weirdos. What’s so great about that.”
D-COP
“Guess you could say I have a case of puppy love… for the class. Puppy love for the class.”
B-COP
“Whatever.”
They get into the car.
CUT TO MS OF CAR INTERIOR
D-COP
“Oh, can we stop at the pet store. My doctor recommended I eat more dog food.”
B-COP
“What. You sure he’s a doctor cause that does not sound like something a doctor would say.”
D-COP
“Well he did have a stethoscope and accepted my insurance.”
B-COP
“Whatever. Lets just get going. This day just keeps getting worse.”
D-COP
“Oh, don’t be sad. I’ll share some of the dog food with you.”
FADE OUT
Up Late, Late At Night: Season One, Episode One, Act I script
scripts, Uncategorized, Up Late, Late at Night———–<.thom & ophi.>———–
UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!
Season 01, Episode 01
(Act 1)
By Thomas Typewriter & Ophidia Operahouse-Typewriter
(c) 2020
———–<:type & opera:>———–
ACT I
FADE IN
EXT. THE TRASHIPELIGO ISLANDS, EVENING
LS OF A MODEL OF THE ISLAND. A RADIO TOWER OVER ON ONE END OF THE ISLAND BLINKS AND WE HEAR THE TRANSMISSION BEEPY-BEEPY-BEEP.
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Broadcasting from the hidden heart of Mout Trashuvius of the Trashipeligo Islands, this is UP LATE, LATE AT NIGHT!”
CUT TO…
Title sequence plays
CUT TO…
INT. THE TRASH HOLE. NIGHT
A large cavern in the base of the Trashipeligo Island’s dormant volcano, Mount Trashuvius, the large abstract mask-like face of T-RASH THE TRASH GOD floats over a smoking pool of sludge and magma. Surrounding him are piles of trash.
PAN IN TO CS OF T-RASH
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“I am the T-Rash the God of Trash your host and guiding star. No more do you need to worry about the quest for new and better. New is an illusion and I am here to pierce the veil clouding your vision. Join us and rejoice for everything is trash. Broken, discarded, subject to the whims of entropy. Make trash from trash is what I say. Now let’s get the show underway. Acolytes to me!”
CUT TO LS OF TRASH HOLE.
D-VID and B_MAX enter. D-VID rushes in from stage-right holding a DVD case. B-MAX hurries in from stage-left carrying a VHS cassette tape.
CUT TO CS OF D-VID
D-VID
“Here my lord of lost.”
CUT TO CS OF B-MAX
B-MAX
“Here your clutterness”
CUT BACK TO LS OF TRASH HOLE
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Good. Good. Now what offerings have you brought that our viewers may experience the full vision of my divine artistry. The trashier the better.”
D-VID
“Guess I’ll go first.”
CUT TO CS OF D-VID
D-VID
“Well, I found this copy of Lost and Found in a gull nest. The description on the back is too faded to read but the tagline is “One of these dogs must be Spade.””
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Ohhh..that sounds like trash.”
D-VID
“And it has a picture of a man taking a bath with a dog.”
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“Perfect…I deem your offering worthy of being unworthy.”
CUT BACK TO LS
D-VID throws the DVD into the Trash God’s mouth. His lights glow brighter and in a different color.
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“And you, other one, what did you bring me in offering.”
CS OF B-MAX
B-MAX
“O’ mighty Trash God I scaled the heights of the Hill of Abandonned Sofas to pry from the deep reaches of its crevices this uterly unmint copy of Moving Violations.”
CUT TO CS OF TRASH GOD
THE TRASH GOD
“The Kay Lenz film! I’ve been looking for a copy of that forever.”
CUT TO CS OF B-MAX
B-MAX
“Uhhh, no. This is Moving Violations. Violations with an S. The 1985 film”
CUT TO MS OF T-RASH THE TRASH GOD AND B-MAX
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“I don’t know? Is it trash?”
B-MAX
“Well it says its from the creators of Police Academy.”
T-RASH THE TRASH GOD
“That’s all I need to know. Trash! Your offering pleases me.”
B-Max throws the cassette into the Trash God’s mouth.
PAN OUT TO LS OF THE TRASH HOLE
T-Rash the Trash God’s internal lights change color again and smoke starts to pour from his mouth filling the lair.
THE TRASH GOD
“Your offerings please me, so now let my divine smoke wash over you and guide you and our audience to a vision most horrible, most garbage.”
The smoke fills the room as B-Max and D-Vid start to cough.
B-MAX
“Smells like burning tires.”
THE TRASH GOD
“That’s how you know it is working. Now hush and pass out so we can get on with things.”
B-Max and D-Vid pass out.
PAN IN INTO THE SMOKE.
The white smoke fills the frame as a JANGLY SOUND OF BELLS AND OLD CAR HORNS flutters across.
TRANSITION FROM THE TRASH HOLE TO THE VISION
FADE TO WHITE
Thomas Typewriter 
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